


Feathered

by Hoodedscarlet



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Hybrid AU, Multi, Other, sorta - Freeform, winged!gavin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-02
Updated: 2014-07-12
Packaged: 2018-01-21 15:38:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1555481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hoodedscarlet/pseuds/Hoodedscarlet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gavin Free thinks that his life is basically perfect; a good home, a great job, and amazing friends and coworkers that mean the world to him. So when Gavin comes down with a cold, he doesn't expect his world to flip irreversibly overnight because of it.<br/>But it does, and suddenly Gavin has to learn how to deal with his feathery problem. However, it quickly becomes only one of many he has to somehow deal with...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Gavin thought it was just a bad cold.  
  
He hadn’t even been in the office five minutes, chatting with Barbra about their last game night and how he had _totally_ whipped her ass in Halo, what was she talking about? when he felt a cold shiver run up and down his spine. He quickly shrugged it off, and even though a few more shot through him as they finished their conversation he just waved it off as weird. It was probably the weird ass air conditioning anyway; perhaps even some of that bloody gob about people walking over his grave. Nothing to be worried about  
  
When he walked into the cramped chaos that was the Achievement Hunter office, it was to the usual fanfare of the morning; that was to say, Geoff already sat down and tapping away at his computer, a coffee cup at Jack’s table announcing he was present somewhere in the building and Ray starting to set up to edit an achievement guide. (So really not much fanfare at all; really Gavin himself was usually the one who provided that.)  
As Gavin walked over to lean over the younger man’s shoulder he could see the box for the latest Call of Duty game perched neatly on top, the first of many loading screens plastered in the editing software interface.  
  
“How’s it going, Vav?”  
The Puerto Rican didn’t even have to turn around to recognize the man hovering behind him, and combined with the pet name it made Gavin grin.  
  
“Pretty bloody good X-Ray. This achievement particularly hard to get?”  
  
“Eh, I’ve had worse.” Ray admitted. “Nothing unmanageable though really, Mile High Club was a cake walk compared to this.”  
  
“Gavin!” He heard another familiar voice yell from behind him, Ray turning back to his computer and pulling on his headphones.  
  
“Michael!” Gavin replied, eyes brightening as the familiar red head entered the room. “How’s my boy?”  
  
“Good, good.” Michael said, grinning. “You still keen for our bev night Sunday?”  
  
“Of course.” Gavin said with a grin. “When am I not?”  
  
“Gotta make sure, you idiot.” Michael said, rolling his eyes. “We’ve got some catching up to do.”  
  
“And we don’t every other week?” Gavin teased.  
  
“Yeah, yeah, shut up.” Michael replied, dropping the subject and for a moment Gavin was tempted to ask if everything was alright – it was usually him that double checked that their plans were all go like an over excited puppy, not to mention Michael looked almost… Nervous?  
The thought died on his tongue though as another shiver crawled its way down his spine, taking the time to sweep across each vertebrae of his spine like an attentive lover. Gavin stuck out his lower lip in protest. Ugh. There was a reason he liked to will away colds and flus. He sure was doing that as Geoff nudged him and told him to get Ryan because they ‘had shit to film’.  
  
Lindsay and Ryan were talking by the time Gavin found them, and while the other man was more than engrossed in the conversation his eyes lit up when he saw Gavin appear from around the corner.  
  
“Was wondering when you’d show your face.” He said, grinning as he relaxed back in his chair. Lindsay just gave Gavin a knowing look like they were both in on the joke (what the joke was he had no idea) before rolling back to her own computer. Gavin just shot a stupid look at Lindsay, which she returned without skipping a beat.  
  
“Ryan!” Gavin greeted the other man, signature dorky grin crossing his face. “You ready for some Achievement Hunter action?”  
  
“Geoff sent you out here, didn’t he?”  
  
“Well yeah.” Gavin admitted. “But I wanted to come get you anyway! Team Love n’ Stuff, yeah?” He wasn’t expecting the comment to make the man’s face light up a bit, but it just made him grin even more.  
  
“Tell Geoff to unbunch his fucking nana knickers, I’ll be there in a sec.” And his voice was straight deadpan but there was a smile curling at his features. Gavin had to laugh, even as he trotted back off to the Achievement Hunter office to walk in on what seemed to be an equally hilarious discussion between Jack and Geoff. From what Gavin could make out between everybody’s laughter Jack was still very much in the habit of eating anything that landed near his desk and Geoff was now three cookies down and not happy about it.  
  
As Gavin settled into his chair and turned on his Xbox, the others clambering back into their seats (some more literally than others) Gavin had to think how lucky he was that he worked here, with co-workers and friends he wouldn’t trade for the world.  
(Perhaps the words didn’t sound quite right on his tongue, as he pulled his hoodie tighter around him. But what was wrong was a mystery – and certainly not a mystery he wanted to solve right now.)  
  
-x-  
  
By lunchtime it felt like he had a physical force beating at the inside of his skull.  
It was bad enough that he was struggling to keep up the banter by the end of the Let’s Play they had filmed, but by the time they took a break he couldn’t even lift his head from the desk, his breathing coming heaving in his chest as he continued to shiver. Why he was shivering he had no bloody idea, because he could feel the sweat beading on his forehead. By the look on Jack’s face when the man found him, he looked as bad as he felt.  
Of course it was going to be Jack that found him like this too. The man that seemed to have a honing device towards anybody who was feeling screwed up - Gavin had to admit he probably qualified for that now.  
  
“Shit, you need to go home.” The redhead said, worry etching lines into his face as he pulled his hand away from the Brit’s burning forehead.  
  
Gavin just mumbled a ‘yeah, alright’ as his head slumped back towards the counter, his chest feeling too tight and his shoulders tensing far too tight. He could almost feel the concern radiating out from the older man and it made him smile in his pain addled state; he really was lucky he knew the guy.  
Geoff, thankfully, had enough time to take him home. Gavin was able to pass the time going back by resting his head on the window and trying not to think about how each bump in the highway just made him even more uncomfortable. It helped that Geoff had turned the radio on, the chattering of the presenters helping to zone him out.  
  
By the time he made it into bed, Gavin felt like he was dying.  
It was just a cold, he reasoned, just an utterly terrible cold and since it’d been so long since he was sick he was just out of practice with dealing with them.  
Yeah.  
That sounded about right.  
  
Sure, it didn’t explain why his body was now aching like he’d been hit by a train, why he’d be racked by pained shivers that made him feel like his very bones were readjusting in his body. But it was the only explanation that even begun to make sense. Geoff had asked if he was sure he was okay but Gavin had shooed him away, saying ‘if it’s still this bloody bad at the end of the week I’ll go see a doctor, I promise!’ Geoff had only been able to hang around so long as well, making the Brit promise that he would call if it got any worse.  
Gavin agreed, but even though it didn’t get _worse_ it certainly didn't get better, and the pain killers only helped so much. So he curled up into the sheets and squeezed his eyes shut until the pain lulled and he was able to slip into sleep.

The next day had passed in a futile cycle of wake and sleep. His sleep was where there was relief; while it was shallow at best it made him forget how his body cramped, how his insides felt like they were being rung out and strung out like washing pulled too tight and the threads beginning to break. When he woke though it was worse though; his body couldn’t seem to decide whether it was hot and cold and no matter how he seemed to lie down no position felt comfortable. The minutes crawled past on the clock so very slowly, mocking him. Everything hurt, everything hurt, and he had never been more thankful when he finally slipped into a deeper sleep at the end of the day, a hospital patient going under.  
  
The next morning, the pain was gone.  
  
Gavin was almost convinced that it was just his sleep addled state, because he’d been so far _gone_ yesterday; surely it wasn’t that easy? But as he propped himself up on his elbows to wipe the sleep from his eyes he could feel his excitement build. No more pain - he was better! Finally! It was about bloody time!  
The first indicator that Gavin should have noticed was that he was sleeping on his stomach.  
  
Gavin _never_ slept on his stomach – he always slept sprawled out on his back like a dog presenting his stomach for a rub and Geoff had commented on that way too many time for him to possibly forget. But it was Gavin, and he wasn’t one to notice those sorts of things. So when he stood up, what he hadn’t counted on his balance being completely off – hell, it didn’t even seem to _exist_ anymore. With a squawk he fell backwards, yelling in pain as he landed wrong and pain spiked through his back and what the fuck did he even land on? Reflexes kicked in and he rolled to the side and- wait, were those _feathers_?  
  
Breath quick in his cheat he slowly tilted his head, dragging his eyes over the arch of feathers and muscles he could see, moving slightly and he could feel each twitch, the throb in his left shoulder still there from landing on the protrusion wrong just then.  
Shit, _shit_ was he hallucinating?  
He had to be hallucinating. Because if he wasn’t he had fucking _wings_ and no, things like that didn’t happen, they just _didn’t._  
…Did they?  
  
Curiosity got the better of him in the end and he pulled himself up from the bed, staying his weight on the bed post because he wasn’t quite used to his centre of balance being quite so thrown back. Of course, now he was starting to comprehend why, his weight now being distributed a little more… Unusually. But as he finally came into view of the mirror the sight made him want to sit right back down again. Unless this was a very consistent hallucination, there was now a pair of very real wings arching out of his back. Sure, they bent awkwardly since he didn’t even know how to begin holding them right with his new muscles and the large flight feathers curved weirdly along the floor but they were there. The realization made him go weak at the knees.  
  
But the feeling of disbelief was completely incomparable to the feeling that shot through him as he heard the door click open behind him because Geoff Geoff Geoff _shit shit **shit**_. In an attempt to hide whatever the fuck was going on with him Gavin all but threw himself backwards into the bed, limbs flying everywhere – however, he didn’t quite count the fact that by ‘all’ limbs, that now included his wings and by the time Geoff walked into the room they were even more obvious than before. Gavin braced himself.  
  
“You alright there Gav- What in the _dicks_ is that?”  
  
-x-  
  
The breakfast table had been silent for a good few minutes, Gavin staring into his bowl of cereal with an almost traumatized look on his face, stirring around the clumps as they slowly soaked up milk and broke apart. Behind him Gavin’s wings shifted every few seconds; the Brit was starting to realize he could feel every feather like it was an extension of his body and _wow_ it was really tripping him out. He’d managed after a minute though to figure out a way to hook them over the back of the chair so he could actually sit down without squashing them, almost like he was hanging them up. In any other circumstance the sight and thought would’ve been hilarious… Not so much now.  
  
“You look like your cornflakes just proposed marriage.” Geoff joked, although they both knew that he was just as taken aback by Gavin’s new… ‘Additions’ as he was. Hell, Geoff could barely take his eyes off them. Admittedly, Gavin would probably be doing the same (not to mention he probably would’ve done his fair share of poking and prodding by now and wow was he glad that Geoff hadn’t indulged in that) but there was a part of Gavin that just couldn’t accept that these _things_ were his.  
  
“…What are you going to do?”  
  
“I don’t know.” Gavin admitted. “I mean, I bloody well can’t go into work like this, can I? And it’s not like I can go to a doctor and get a check-up!” Geoff just mumbled something in reply into his coffee, taking his time to sip it as his brow furrowed in thought.  
Gavin could never thank the man enough for letting him stay with him when he’d first moved over from England to work at the Rooster Teeth office; having just gotten out of a long term relationship with some woman (Betty or Bethanie or some Sothern Bell name that Gavin wouldn’t even blink an eye at) Geoff’d had a spare bedroom and a too large apartment that was begging to be filled. Considering his ‘landlord’ lived with him, it was a pretty easy arrangement for Gavin to agree to as well.  
  
“You think you can go into work today?”  
  
“Uh, we just had this conversa-“  
  
“No you dick, how do you feel?”  
  
“…Fine.” Gavin said, raising an eyebrow. “I mean, bloody hell I feel way better than I did but that doesn’t really matter-“  
  
“No, it does.” Geoff replied, getting up from the table “I think I have some ace bandages in the medkit – we might be able to hide them if we strap them up.” Gavin could feel a twinge of something unpleasant go through him at the thought – but that was really his only option for now, wasn’t it? So with some reluctance, Gavin agreed, traipsing after Geoff to the bathroom.  
  
-x-  
  
Geoff, apparently, was some sort of genius. The ace bandages were able to squash his wings into his back surprisingly well, and the strange lumps that did remain were hidden under the hoodie he’d stolen off Geoff. Miracles apparently didn’t like being hidden though; already Gavin could feel his muscles ache from the awkward position and the muscles being forced to stay so cramped up but really, he’d have to come back into work _sometime._  
Caught up in his whirring thoughts Gavin had barely registered the drive into work or walking into the Rooster Teeth foyer, hands buried in the pockets of the hoodie and if he’d worked in a normal office everybody would have just left him to it.  
Sometimes though, he forgot he didn’t work in a normal office.  
  
“Geez Gavin, you cold there?” Michael said, clapping him on the shoulders and making him squawk rather loudly because he could feel his wings thrumming and _oh bloody hell keep your hands there don’t move them down don’t touch my wings stop._  
  
“Jesus Michael, what the bloody hell are you doing?” Gavin replied, unable to keep some of his inner monologue out of his reply. The redhead just grinned, rubbing at his shoulders through the thick fabric and he’d forgotten how _physical_ Michael was (and no, this was not the time to make a sex joke goddamnit).  
  
“Somebody’s touchy today~” Michael said with a grin.  
  
“Well I have been sick for a few days, you minge.” Gavin shot back, hoping the fearful edge to his voice didn’t come though too strongly. Thankfully Michael seemed to believe his excuse, disappearing into the Achievement Hunter office with an affectionate ‘Don’t take forever you idiot, I’ve missed you!’ yelled in his direction. Geoff had given him a sympathetic smile before he too disappeared into the office.  
  
Barb had cracked a couple of jokes about him and Geoff getting cosy (perhaps the hoodie hadn’t been such a great idea – they’d recorded a couple of episodes of Go! this morning and he was sure the Plan G shipping was going to go off the charts when those came out) but besides that the morning passed without incident.  
Until lunchtime, when his back _really_ started to ache. Not the ache from a couple of days ago though; this was the ache of muscles held back too long like he’d tensed his neck and the muscles had had enough.  
  
It’d been Jack that had noticed of course, seen the way that Gavin was slumping over in visible pain and quietly suggested that maybe he wasn’t quite right from his ‘cold’. Usually Gavin would’ve waved it off, been quick to dismiss it but he could feel the feathers itching against his back, the new muscles cramping and desperate for release as the pain shot up into his shoulder blades. Geoff had bent some of his longer feathers up into the bandages as well and those were the ones that were now causing him the most grief; he could feel the bend in each one like he was holding his fingers just a bit too far back.  
  
But Gavin was determined, and he managed to get through half of the latest Minecraft edit before the pain was starting to make his vision swim. Thankfully Geoff once again was able to make time for him and so Gavin was bundled into the car within a few minutes, the miles passing agonizingly slowly as Geoff rubbed his knee and mumbled comforting words. He added with a slightly cocky grin that ‘Hey, at least it’s the weekend tomorrow, right? Give us some time to figure this out.’  
  
When Geoff finally unlaced the bandages, it was like taking off a bloody corset because finally he could _breathe._ Each strap of bandage he pulled off made him relax more and more until he stood bare chested in their bathroom, the feathers creased but gloriously free. On instinct he pulled on some of the new muscles, feeling the longer feathers unfurl and lift off the ground and wow, that was the most comfortable he’d been all day as the arches of his wings settled pointing up near perpendicular to his spine.  
He’d almost forgotten that Geoff was there until the older man whistled out, impressed.  
  
“Can you spread them?”  
  
“Not in here.” Gavin replied, not even bothering to look around their cramped bathroom to know that there definitely wasn’t enough space. He didn’t need to be prompted again by Geoff though, and he moved into the living room. His heart was hammering; were the muscles strong enough? Did he know what he was doing? But he shood off the thoughts; even if he didn’t know what he was doing he was Gavin Free damn it. He’d bluff his way through it sooner or later.

However, the last thing he needed to do was bluff as he branched his wings out, his wingspan slowly unfurling as they crossed basically the whole room. The inner feathers were a beautiful creamy colour, fading into a dusky brown at the tips. The back of his wings were darker in colour, starting in the dusky browns and getting down to almost black on the larger feathers. They rustled in the light breeze from the window, Gavin closing his eyes as he let his wings flex and move with a grace that was near unnatural for the man. The moment was magical.  
His wings were beautiful.

“Still not sure what to think about the bloody things.” Gavin said, flashing a slightly dorky grin as he relaxed his wings, the limbs falling awkwardly on the ground and just like that, the illusion was broken.  
  
“...I should be getting back before Burnie tears me a new asshole.” Geoff admitted after a moment, shrugging. Gavin nodded, telling him to pick up some takeaways for the two of them before the older gent left the house.  
No sooner had the gent left the house had Gavin sat himself down at the computer, once again hooking his wings over the back of the chair as Google loaded up on the screen.  
  
He had some research to do.  
  
-x-  
  
By the time Geoff came home, Gavin had learnt a few things.  
Firstly, his condition was beyond strange. He’d expected that, honestly, but even Google wasn’t coming up with results for ‘spontaneously growing wings’ beside dubious fan fictions that he really wasn’t going to take as fact. Mythology wasn’t giving him much to go off either, unless he was an angel and therefore more holy than he’d ever known (and he was pretty sure he’d slept with a few too many people for that to be the case).  
  
With research on that front being a dead end, he instead turned to what he hoped would be more helpful advice; looking into birds themselves. Anatomy, wing shapes, moulting times (which didn’t sound very pleasant at all). If he was going to be stuck with these things, he could at least learn as much as he could about them.  
It seemed his wings most closely resembled some sort of hawk, the broad wingspan allowing him to glide on thermals for long amounts of time, tapering into thin tips that would allow him to twist into tight manoeuvres. He was just starting to read up on parrot flight training tutorials (because that was apparently a thing) when Geoff came in, carrying Chinese in small boxes.  
  
“Feeling better?”  
  
“Yeah.” Gavin said dismissively, clicking on a few more things. Geoff placed the containers on the bench, before pulling up a seat beside Gavin.  
  
“Anything interesting?”  
  
“Well if Google’s right, I’m Cupid.”  
  
“Wow, then Google’s stupid as dicks.” Geoff laughed, taking a seat, watching as the young Brit scrolled and clicked, feathers rustling every few seconds as Gavin shifted in his seat.  
  
“Seriously though, you figured out anything?”  
  
“About why I have these things? Nope.” Gavin shrugged. “Just some sightings and gunk but even then the ‘people’ were like 7 feet tall and glowing so it’s probably a pile of munge.” He shrugged in a ‘what-did-we-expect’ sort of manner before continuing. “Although there was some interesting stuff about feathers and wings of birds. Did you know you actually have to teach some birds to fly?”  
  
“You think you can fly?” Geoff asked in return.  
  
Huh.  
That was a new thought.  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“I mean,” Geoff added, shifting his weight on his seat “that there would probably need to be more than just wings appearing on your back to make sure you can fly, right? Your centre of balance has to be right and your lungs have to have adapted and you’d need to be muscly as dicks.” He paused for a moment, the both of them looking at the younger man’s once lanky frame. ‘Once’ was probably the best descriptor for it – while he was certainly no Captain America there was definitely more muscles stretched across his shoulders and torso than before and _oh_ , okay that was a new one.  
“Okay, scratch that part.” Geoff added with an almost disbelieving laugh (and who could blame him? He could barely believe it himself). “But seriously, your bones would need to be hollow as well so you’re light enough.”  
  
“…You’ve been doing just as much research as me, haven’t you?” Gavin said teasingly, a grin splitting his face.  
  
“I’m sat in front of a computer all day, what were you expecting when my friend suddenly becomes Birdman overnight?”

“Well, I was expecting more jokes.” Gavin said with a laugh. Geoff just gave him a sly look.  
  
“Would you say I’m acting… Chicken?” Gavin nearly spit took as soon as Geoff spoke because really? _Really?_  
  
“Have you been talking to Barb? You’ve been talking to Barb, haven’t you?”  
  
“I would have said it anyway, you dumbass.” Geoff said rolling his eyes. “Now come on, dinner’s going to get cold- Wait.” Geoff paused for a minute. ”You’ve rung your parents, right?”  
  
“Huh?” Gavin replied, blinking dumbly.  
  
“Gavin, since I doubt this is some sort of disease, it’s probably genetic.” Geoff said. “And if anybody’s going to know about your genetics, its probably going to be your parents.”  
  
A beat of silence.  
  
“…You’re bloody brilliant.” Gavin finally said, grinning. Considering it was going to be ridiculous o’ clock over in Britain though, Gavin settled for flicking his parents an email, and as he and Geoff settled down to eat and banter over dinner, Gavin couldn’t help but be thankful that Geoff was acting so… Well, normal. He might have wings now, but it didn't necessarily mean that he was entirely comfortable with them. Having somebody there that could just act like nothing had happened?  
He couldn’t ask for a better friend.

-x-

_From: Michael_  
 _To: Gavin._  
  
 _Yo everything okay for tonight boi?_

_I’ve got booze._

  
_Or bevs if you want to get picky._

  
_Gav?_  
 __  
Fuck.  
In the recent commotion of the week (and the now rather unusual protrusions on his back) Gavin had managed to completely forget about their Nice Dynamite get together tonight. Hell, Sunday had seemed ages away when Michael had brought up at work; he’d always loved how their next hang out time would roll around so quickly because there was no better way to spend time than with his boy.  
But this time, it had rolled around much, _much_ too quickly and it wasn’t like he could back out now. So that was how the Brit ended up at the doorstep of Michael’s flat, a box of beers in one hand and his other one fiddling nervously at the hem of his sweatshirt.  
  
Michael opened the door, familiar brown eyes meeting his and he was enveloped in a man hug with hands that were straying just a bit too far and _fuck_ Gavin already knew this evening was going to be a bad idea. His wings twitched uncomfortably under their strapping as Michael held him here. But he managed as he did so many things to shrug off the feelings, coming into Michael’s surprisingly clean apartment with a hiss and a roar. Beers clinked down onto the bench, followed soon by two bottle tops as the lads toasted to the nights shenanigans. Pretty soon Gavin was laughing at himself for even starting to think that this was a bad idea as they duked it out in a Peggle game (Michael betting the Brit that he could beat his sorry ass even if he didn’t have the experience of watching Geoff hack away at it all hours of the day).  
  
It was when alcohol was buzzing in his system and conversation topics took a turn that Gavin started to think his first gut instincts may have been more right than he had wanted to hope.  
  
“So what even happened around here Micooool~?” Gavin said, “Did you have a girl over or something? This place is looking bloody top, I’ve never seen it look so tidy!” Michael suddenly didn’t look as comfortable as before.  
  
“Not exactly.” Michael admitted, leaning forward onto his knees. He stared into his beer bottle for a moment, swirling the dregs around before turning to the Brit. “We get along great right?”  
  
“Of course, Team Nice Dynamite forever, am I right?” Gavin replied, grinning despite the way it felt slightly wrong on his face and Michael just looked a tad too serious.  
  
“Of course.” Michael replied. “But ah, Gav…” And suddenly he was playing with his finger and Gavin just snapped on and oh. _Oh._ This wasn’t just some confirmation of their friendship was it?  
The next thing he registered was Michael kissing him.  
Gavin’s eyes flew open as Michael closed the gap between them, the red head’s eyes squeezed tight as if to protect him in case this was a bad idea. His lips were softer than Gavin had expected, pressed to his with the fierceness he expected of the man and god, it was wonderful, it was absolutely wonderful the way that he kissed and Gavin couldn’t help but kiss back as he melted into it because this was Michael, this was his _boy-_  
  
Then he felt Michael’s fingers go to his shoulders and everything shut down.  
Because his wings were under there, he hadn’t even come to terms with the bloody things himself and suddenly Michael’s hands were way too close, _he_ was way too close. Gavin pushed him away, stumbling to his feet and in his drunken state he could barely stay upright. But adrenaline pumped in his system because he had to get away, had to get away and he blurted out the first words that came to mind.  
“I just- we just- we can’t Michael, we _can’t_.”  
  
He heard Michael shout something out after him as he fled from the apartment, phone already in hand to call a taxi (because fuck getting Geoff up at this hour, he’d already dragged the man around enough this week). All that repeated in his head was that he had to get home, he had to go, he had to be _safe_. Perhaps it wasn’t about feeling safe, perhaps it was more that he didn’t even really believe the things on his back were his, didn’t even know how to start dealing with them. But it was one in the morning and he couldn't do this.  
  
It wasn’t until he was safe in his room that Gavin realized what he had done.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wings, apparently, aren't as glamorous as they look. Neither is hiding them. And with relationships falling apart left right and centre around Gavin, he needs to figure out where to go from here. Because if he doesn't, his only option might be away from Rooster Teeth - and the men that he adores so much.

To say that there was a little bit of tension in the office on Monday was seriously understating the reality.  
Unusually for him, Gavin couldn’t even meet Michael’s eyes when he came into the office, shame low in his gut as he planted all his stuff onto his desk for the day while being all too aware of the man behind him. Usually he was able to ignore this sort of thing; woman had come in and out of his life like clockwork, playthings that couldn’t capture his attention much less his admiration for more than a few hours. But there was something about Michael that just had him stuck – because as much as he would want to try and convince himself otherwise, he hadn’t freaked out because of the kiss itself. Which presented three problems really. Firstly, that he was still not as comfortable with his wings as he would have liked. Secondly, that perhaps he liked Michael more than he had first thought. And thirdly, he had royally fucked up any chance of them being a thing.  
  
Perhaps the worst part though was that Gavin _knew_ he had felt the feeling before, he knew it, and he was too stubborn to admit to himself just with whom else. He was a free spirit, he was Gavin **Free** and the thought of being tied down by _emotion_ and _feelings_ was kind of terrifying.  
 _  
_Thank god his morning was dedicated to making Vines for the Rooster Teeth channel; although he had to bullshit his way through explaining why he was wearing another thick jersey it was soon lost in a chaos of horse heads and birthday cake as he successfully shoved his worries aside in favour of the work he so loved. It was a welcome break from the judging stares of his best friend. At one point it felt like he was going to get bloody heat stroke, and Barb had given him a questionable look, but sometimes being the company dumbass had its benefits.  
  
By the time it was time for the GTA Let’s Play Gavin had slipped back into his persona, all loud voiced and no filter and it relaxed him just a little to hear the rest of the team laugh at his stupid antics. In no time the six of them were running around laughing, racing around in cars in figure 8’s as part of Ray’s elaborate heist and it felt _normal_. The heist actually seemed to be going well; that was, until Ryan decided to be a prick, blowing out one of Gavin’s tires. Gavin thought he was safe but he didn’t see Michael coming up around the corner, and in some display of stupidity he managed to ram the front of Michael’s car and blow them both up in the most spectacular display he’d ever seen.  
  
“God DAMN IT Gavin, you fucking idiot!” Michael yelled into the microphone, slamming his fists into the table while Gavin made various noises of confusion, Geoff doubling over with laughter and Jack not too far behind him.  
  
“How could you be so _stupid_ Gavin?” Geoff said with a laugh.  
  
“You dumb fuck!” Michael added venomously, and Gavin couldn’t help but register the hurt in his eyes, so easily veiled by his own persona and he couldn’t swallow past the lump in his throat. Of course, nobody else registered the silent exchange, the all true reality behind the words.  
  
“And in breaking news, Team Nice Dynamite has exploded.” Ryan added with a grin. “Michael looks about ready to tear Gavin a new asshole – I mean we all knew it was going to happen sometime right?”  
Gavin knew it was a joke. He knew it was, it wasn’t even that _bad_ but the comment hit him where it hurt and he struggled to keep his cheery persona up even as the rest of the heist crashed and burned spectacularly around him. The comment repeated over and over in his head - because he didn’t want it to be true, how could Ryan be so heartless to point it out?  
When Ryan left the room, Gavin was happy to see him leave.  
  
-x-  
  
Gavin came home to a missed call from his parents.  
Thankfully, the time zone difference was kind, and while Gavin’s mum had gone off to bed his dad was able to pick up, a sleep addled voice greeting his son. Gavin was quick to say hello, rattling off a few of the days occurrences with the exuberance of a man that could make a living out of his enthusiasm.  
The first thing his dad said was sorry.  
  
Apparently, as he explained to him with careful words, Gavin’s wings were a recessive gene, passed down from father to son from the days when the quick transport was more than helpful and the appendages themselves could’ve been written off as myth. But after too many incidents when their ancestors had been burned as witches and or demons (the woman in particular – he wasn’t sure if woman even carried the gene anymore) they had settled in England. Known for its dreary, miserable weather – perfect to discourage the growth of wings.

“It’s been dormant for about five or six generations now.” The older man said. “But being back in the heat of Austin would’ve kick-started the genes back into action. To be honest, I’m surprised they’re still there. I thought they actually were a bloody myth!” He barked out the last sentence with a laugh that Gavin couldn’t quite tell whether it was genuine or not.  
  
They talked for a while – about what Gavin had learnt, more history. But one thing lead to another and that conversation was now the reason why Gavin was perched on top of the house, staring down at the ground with a trepidation that he hadn’t felt in a long time. His father words rung in his ears – _You need to start learning to fly Gavin. Your muscles can support you now, but leave it too long and you’ll never get off the ground.  
_ “And the only thing worse than wings are wings you can’t use.” Gavin mumbled to himself, wings furling and unfurling in an attempt to psyche himself up.  
One that really wasn’t working – it didn’t matter how many times he did it, the faith in his wings was still shaky at best and the ground looked so painfully far away. Geoff was standing on the ground below, yelling up various encouragements to the nervy Brit.  
  
“You know flying is just falling and missing the ground.”  
  
“You think I’m _not_ going to screw this up?”  
  
“You think I want to stand out here all night and watch you fluff up like a scardy cat?”  
  
“I’m not a scardy cat!”  
  
“Then jump!”  
  
“Fine!”  
  
Swallowing thickly, he stood up, determination a steeled mask on his face as he stood up, feet steadying him on the tiled roof. The breeze was thankfully light; Gavin could feel it run through his feathers like wispy fingers.  
One step.  
Two steps.  
Gavin jumped.  
  
Apparently it just wasn’t that easy though. Gavin squawked as he felt himself quickly lose altitude, wings flailing as he tried in vain to beat them. Supposedly instinct was going to kick in, that the adrenaline would make _something_ click but Gavin could spend more time on the ground then standing on it some days even before he got these wings and that sort of instinct was apparently pretty hard to override.  
But for a moment, just for a moment, he could feel something. An unfamiliar thrill, the feeling of something _right_ as his wings tilted just so, as his body angled just right-  
  
He crash landed into the ground with a soft _whoomp!_ , another fittingly bird like squawk coming from the Brit as he lay stunned on the ground. His wings collapsed around him, breath like a rabbit in his chest as it raced and raced and even if he wanted to stand up he kind of couldn’t right now.  
Geoff was there to pick him off the ground of course, but they both quickly realized that Gavin was shaking so much from the potent mix of fear and adrenaline that he was probably going to break something if he tried again; and while between the two of them they hadn’t quite decided if Gavin needed to go to a doctor or a vet, they didn’t want to find out _quite_ this soon.  
  
-x-

Whenever Jack was the one to confront him, Gavin knew he had screwed up big time somehow.  
  
The rest of the week had passed with little incident really, and today alone Gavin had recorded a Trials HUNT with Geoff, ignoring Ryan when he’d tried to make conversation afterwards. But everybody had their bad days, right? Already as it was, his wing muscles were straining something wicked under his shirt; he wanted to do nothing more than sit up on the roof of the office and feel the breeze run through his hair. Even if he could just get outside and _move_ it would be better than sitting cooped up in the office _.  
_ God _damn,_ his bird instincts were starting to show through.  
  
With Michael and Ray out of the office for various reasons and the recordings that could be done without them finished, Geoff had dedicated the rest of the Friday to editing, hopefully adding a bit of buffering to their backlog.  
Gavin had decided to take his lunch break later in the day though, missing the rush and chatter of the lunch crowd in favour of the empty room. The only sound in the room besides his breathing was the hum of the microwave; silence had become something Gavin had learned to appreciate as it wrapped the room thickly.  
(‘Appreciate’ might not have been the right word though, although it was the one Gavin stubbornly chose to use; but the way it wrapped around his throat and slowly tightened, the way it settled in his lungs and made it hard to breath, letting it fill him until his vision swam and Gavin was always used to filling the silence himself so how would he ever know what it was like to appreciate it?)  
  
“Gavin?”  
  
The familiar redhead appeared from around the corner, glasses perched low on his nose and a container of food in one hand.  
  
“Hey.”  
  
“What’s going on?”  
  
“Nothing much.” His answers were short, curt; hopefully Jack would get the message.  
If he did, he ignored it completely.  
  
“No, what’s _really_ going on Gavin?” He asked, voice soft but firm. “We’re worried about you, you know.”  
  
“There’s nothing to be worried about.”  
  
“Then why have you been so off ever since you’ve been sick?” Jack asked. “Ray’s barely seen you, Ryan thinks you hate him, Michael hates you back-“ Gavin’s mouth became a thin line, arms folding protectively in front of him.”- and I don’t even know what’s going on with Geoff. I, _we_ just want to help Gavin.”  
  
“I don’t need any bloody help, okay?!” Gavin snapped, and he could see Jack flinch back just the slightest bit and his wings instinctively jerk back to try and cover him. But they were as bound up as usual and fuck, the whiplash from the action _hurt_ and Gavin could barely muffle the whimper as the muscles in his wings began to ache again.  
  
“Gavin, seriously, what the fuck is going on-“  
  
“Jack, not now _damnit.”_ And finally the redhead seemed to get the message as Gavin all but charged past him with his lunch, thankful not for the first time that he had a separate office to the other men.  
He would be fine.  
His cramped muscles pulsed again and he wiped his eyes as his vision started to swim.  
He would be _fine._  
  
Maybe.  
  
-x-  
  
When Barbara invited him over for a game night on Sunday, Gavin had to accept. He needed a night with no questions, no funny looks or stares that seemed to eat him through like acid, and by god if he could count on anybody it was the woman who had just as stupid a sense of humour as him.  
Geoff had given him a look as he helped Gavin bind up his wings; they both knew how Gavin hated restricting his wings for any longer than necessary and having Barb around was keeping him bound up even more than normal. But he needed this, being in the Achievement Hunter office was starting to feel like he was stepping on eggshells constantly – which wasn’t something he was good at doing.  
  
Barbara’s flat was homely as always, just enough clutter to make it feel lived it and Gavin wasted no time with sprawling himself out on his usual couch, beer in hand as he grabbed the Xbox controller perched on the side table. Barbara curled up on her own armchair, Halo loading up on the screen as the two chatted and laughed and clinked drinks.  
But as the evening wore on, Gavin could feel the ache in his wings grow – they weren’t meant to be caged up, bound up. Barbara wasn’t born yesterday either and the more Gavin squirmed the more concerned she became.  
  
Surprisingly, it was Gavin that paused the game, turning to Barbara with nerves scrawled all across his face.  
  
“You’d never think I’m a freak, right?”  
  
“Never.” Barbara was quick to respond, sincerity wrapping her words and making the knot in his stomach lessen by just the smallest bit. “An idiot, always. Never a freak though.” And even though that confirmation was there, Gavin couldn’t help his voice squeaked as he finally spoke.  
  
“…I have something to show you.”  
  
His heart was going like a drum in his chest as he pulled off his shirt, eyes focused on his fingers fumbling at the bandages and Barbara’s gaze felt too hot on his neck as he stripped away the fabric. The only thing that had untensed in the room was his wings now free of their confines to settle tight against his back and he could hear Barbara take a sharp breath in as he shook them out slightly and oh god, she was going to think he was a freak what the fuck was he doing-  
  
“Holy shit.”  
  
Gavin had never seen Barbara look so awestruck in her life, eyes running over the bridges of the wings with a rampant fascination.  
  
“So this was why you were sick, huh?”  
  
Gavin nodded.  
  
“And why you’ve been really weird recently- oh _wow_ Gavin they’re awesome!”  
  
Awesome?  
“Yeah..?” Gavin said, and he didn’t even try to hide the shock on his face at the words because in bracing himself for the worst he’d forgotten that there were better outcomes. And this? This was the best god damn outcome he could have gotten and quite frankly he had no idea what to do with himself. He probably wouldn’t have snapped out of it very quickly either if he’d been left to his own devices, but it was two familiar hands on his shoulders that grounded him; he looked up and the familiar blue were filled with nothing but warmth.  
  
“You’re an idiot, and you’re also an idiot with wings. And even you don’t act like it sometimes you I think you know what you’re doing. You’re one of my best friends Gavin.” She smiled, and Gavin couldn’t help but smile back. “And I’m here for you, okay?”  
  
“Thanks.” Gavin said quietly. Barbara smiled as well, before gesturing to them.  
  
“Okay, I’m no bird expert, but having them bunched up like this can’t be comfortable. Sit back, relax!” She said, flopping back on the couch herself for emphasis. “It’s not like you don’t usually.”  
  
And when he woke up sprawled across the couch the next morning, wings tumbling unceremoniously onto the floor as Barbara walked in with pancakes, Gavin couldn’t help the goofy grin that spread across his face as he realized that maybe, maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad after all.  
  
-x-  
  
“Gavin, we need to figure out what you’re going to do about this.”  
  
Geoff’s words were laden with a deeper meaning that Gavin couldn’t quite grasp – already it was making him nervous. Then again, nervous seemed to be a constant emotional state for him these days; he wasn’t sure whether it was the bird in him coming out, or if it was just the constant stress from being essentially hiding from the world day after day, a refugee still lost in the battle zone. His wings tensed behind him, as if bracing for a quick take off.  
  
“Look, as much as I really enjoy your company, I’m your boss. And we just can’t function like this. You’re putting a strain on all of us Gavin.” Despite the urge not to, Geoff had cut straight to the point; Gavin frankly couldn’t blame the older man.  
“We need to be all happy, concise and _together_ , and when half of the group thinks you hate them and the other half hates you back something really needs to change. And… well, if we can’t figure out how to stitch this cluster fuck back together we’re going to have to look at doing what’s best for the company.”  
  
Gavin gulped.  
Honestly? He should’ve seen it coming; while they were all essentially actors wearing caricatures for the camera it didn’t change the fact that the tensions from real life were starting to leak into the videos like a vicious poison. It was a thin line between a friendly rivalry and something deeper showing through as well – and as Geoff was quick to show, more than a few commenters on their latest videos has started to notice the unease between the six men.  
Shit.  
“But how am I supposed to..” Gavin trailed off, waving his hands in a nonspecific gesture as if waiting for Geoff to cut him off. But the older man didn’t; he just sighed and shook his head and it sent a stab of something he couldn’t quite put a name to through him. The man had given him so much; a home, a job, a smile and a shoulder to lean on and the realization hit him in the chest that _oh_ , perhaps Michael wasn’t the only crush he had.  
  
He didn’t have to make the first move though.  
Worn fingers cupped his face, pulling him into a kiss that was sweet, so sweet, the gentle push pull rhythm cautious as they learnt how the other moved. Geoff kissed with the skill of a man who had been around the block more than his fair share of times; it was the sort of kiss that left Gavin panting even though they hadn’t been doing this for more than five minutes. It wasn’t until Gavin’s wings came around them like a cocoon that Geoff pulled away, cheeks flushed slightly as he began to laugh.  
  
“I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to those wings.”  
Gavin frowned, pulling them back in tight to his body.  
“I like it though.” Geoff finished his sentence, an easy smile on his face and it made Gavin’s heart flutter. “I like _you._ ”  
  
“I do too.” Gavin replied with a smile, giving in to the urge to lean on Geoff, Geoff’s fingers coming up to card through the Brit’s hair. Silence passed for a few beats; for once it didn’t feel like it was going to choke him.  
  
“We’re still going to need to figure out what we’re going to tell the others, you know that right?” Gavin looked up.  
  
“We?”  
  
“Well if… well, this is going to be a thing, I’m going to be helping you out Gav.” Geoff said. “What do you take me for, some sort of assho- don’t answer that.”  
  
The cheeky grin said everything Gavin needed to say.  
  
-x-  
  
“How the fuck did you get up there?”  
  
“Uh, magic?”  
  
The Brit looked down, Jack peering up at him with the most befuddled look on his face. Whatever instincts that came with his wings were playing up something wicked today; it felt like the feathers were sticking up every which angle and the bandages were crushing the quills that had wiggled loose into his back more than a little painfully. And with Michael still shooting him looks that made his stomach turn, Ray wondering just what the hell was going on and any other attempts at conversation falling flat on their face as Gavin resisted the urge to just _go._  
He couldn’t do it forever though; but then he remembered the ladder on the side of the studio building.  
  
The heat of the midday was warm on his back, more than inviting and if releasing his wings wasn’t going to start the god damn apocalypse on his ass if somebody saw them then he would have unbound them as soon as he’d step foot on the iron.  
Thankfully he hadn’t.  
  
“No Gavin, seriously, how the hell did you? Teleport? We’re not in Halo!”  
  
“Or are we?” Gavin quipped back. The following look that Jack gave him was enough for him to fold, him gesturing to the side ladder. The redhead appeared a few moments later, cheeks slightly red from the exertion.  
  
‘’Mind if I sit down?” Gavin just shrugged, gesturing to the roofing next to him.  
It was strange – conversation slipped into their usual back and forward and if guilt hadn’t wrapped around his gut and pulled tight like a string Gavin could’ve almost pretended it was normal, _this_ was normal. Almost pretend that none of this shit had ever happened and they were both sitting on the roof because Gavin was a dumbass and this was the sort of shit that happened when he was around. But when conversation trailed off, a strange look crossing Jack’s face, Gavin was quick to become worried – what had happened? What had he done?  
  
“Gavin…” Jack said after a while, looking down at his hands. “I’m sorry.”  
  
“For what?”  
  
“For pushing you.” Jack stated simply, eyes downcast. “I didn’t mean to push you, I’m just worried you know? You’ve just been so… Not you, you know?”  
  
“Jack…” Gavin said, and somehow he was able to swallow past the lump in his throat. “I…”  
Realizing words were going to fail him he fiddled with the hem of his shirt, before lifting it over his head in a swift motion. He saw Jack’s eyes widen at the bandages (perhaps pulling the wrong conclusions entirely) as Gavin stripped them off, releasing his wings which folded tightly against his back in fear.  
He’d never seen Jack speechless before.  
  
“Yeah.” Gavin said flatly, as if he could explain everything with the word.  
  
“Well, this wasn’t what I was expecting.”  
  
“What were you?” Gavin asked timidly, curiosity overwhelming him.  
  
“I thought you wanted to leave us- you don’t, do you?”  
  
“Never!” Gavin replied quickly, desperation making his voice crack and quiver and he didn’t realize just how much Jack’s opinion meant to him, how much _Jack_ mean to him. And if the look on Jack’s face was anything to go by he was more than relived by the answer.  
  
“Can you spread them?”  
  
Gavin didn’t answer, except letting the appendages unfold, the feathers blocking out the sun in a show that casted dramatic shadows over the roof despite it being the midday hours. Gavin watched the red head’s face slowly light up in awe, something… Proud? Excited? Brightening his features and it made his heart flutter and his wings responded in kind.  
  
“What’s it like having them?”  
  
“Bloody weird.” Gavin replied with a laugh. “They have a mind of their own and they get really uncomfortable at times.” He clumsily shook them for emphasis.  
  
“Like now?”  
  
“Yeah, why?”  
  
“It looks like you need to preen them.” Jack said, a smile tugging at the end of his words and if Gavin was a more shy man he probably would’ve blushed at that; he should’ve guessed that it was more than just being forced to bind his wings that was causing the discomfort. He wasn’t expecting, however, for the redhead to offer to do it himself.

“You’ll have to let me know if I’m doing it wrong, but it might be a bit more comfortable than you doing it yourself?”  
  
“You just want an excuse to touch them, don’t you?” Gavin said with a nervous quip in his voice, even as he smiled goofily. “I mean, they are cool, but there’s being subtle and there’s that.” The uncertain notion to his voice didn’t escape the older man though, and Jack’s brow furrowed at the sound.  
  
“I don’t want to make you uncom-“  
  
“I’m not.” Gavin said quickly. “Just… Nervous. Nobody’s really touched my wings before. Hell, _I’ve_ barely touched them and they’re on my bloody back!”  
It was true too – the only one who had was Geoff, and that was only because he was the one who had to muscle them into position to bind them up , which hardly counted in Gavin’s books.  
There was something about him still that… Unsettled him. Perhaps it was the fact they’d come so quickly into his life, that they demanded the dictation over his actions and words that he had never given freely. But the choice had been wrenched from his hands, replaced by the rabbit’s heart that thudded in his chest; the constant unknowing making him shake.  
  
“You’re going to need to try and come to peace with them though Gavin.” Jack said, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “They’re not going away, are they?” Gavin just shook his head, realizing the weight of Jack words. “You’re never going to be able to accept them if you can’t even look behind you.”  
  
“I guess.”  
  
“Here.” Jack manhandled Gavin in front of him, the full extent of Gavin’s plumage exposed to the other man. Slowly, his fingers ran over the layers of feathers, a brush really. Gavin could feel each one that was out of place like a sore thumb; he ducked his head to play with the hem of his jeans.  
It wasn’t a perfect process to begin with; Jack always seemed to pull it so the feather in question was almost but not _quite_ back in position and that was even more infuriating. A couple of times Gavin had just turned around and just done it himself, hoping that Jack would learn from his careful manoeuvring how to settle them back in place or to pull them out if they were too loose. (The first time Jack tried to do that it was on a feather that was still _very much_ attached to his wing – he was thankful that his wings were soft as he clapped Jack around the ears instinctively with the both of them.)  
  
But the afternoon wore on and so did Jack’s preening, his technique improving until the steady pull press of his fingers would’ve made him purr if he was a cat. He smirked at the thought – no need to jinx his luck by saying he was like another sort of animal. Last thing he wanted was to wake up with cat ears or paws instead of feet – those might be a bit harder to hide.  
  
“Gavin.”  
  
“…”  
  
“Gavin, it’s all done.”  
  
He blearily blinked open his eyes, realizing in the process of the afternoon that he’d ended up lying down on his front, the slightly overcast weather keeping the metal under him from getting too hot-  
Shit.  
  
“Please tell me we haven’t been up here long.”  
  
“Already texted Geoff.” Jack said, holding up his phone. “Considering he’s the only one around here who seems to be in a good mood anymore I assumed that he knows about your wings. Assumed correctly too, thank fuck. He’s given us the afternoon ‘off’.”  
  
“You’re bloody top.” Gavin said.  
  
“You too.”  
  
The kiss came as easily as the conversation that proceeded it; a press of lips that melted into a sickly sweet action, Jack’s fingers coming down to stroke at the downy feathers on Gavin’s shoulder blades and the sensation made Gavin nearly coo. Because it felt right, so _right_ and okay perhaps he was starting to realize that this feeling he’d initially realized he’d had for Michael and confirmed with Geoff may also extend to Jack.  
  
“Please tell me you know about-“  
  
“You and Geoff?” Jack said, smiling against Gavin’s lips. “We were just hoping you would say yes.”  
And perhaps that just brought up a whole new set of questions, especially about when exactly the two Gents _had_ that conversation. But as their lips met again with Jack claiming he needed to ‘learn how to kiss around this nose of yours’ Gavin wasn’t really complaining at all.  
  
-x-  
  
If he was hoping that the incident with Michael was going to blow over without another confrontation, he was sadly mistaken.  
Michael was a whirlwind of emotion, packed up with a bundle of curls and the mouth of a sailor and it shouldn’t have been nearly as surprising as it was when Michael finally snapped in the middle of a Play Pals recording.  
  
“Okay Gavin, you’re going to shut the fuck up for a moment and tell me what’s going on.”  
The shift in personality from persona to seething rage was so immediate Gavin quite frankly didn’t know how to respond, looking at the red head with a flabbergasted look on his face.  
  
“I-“  
  
“-and don’t give me any bullshit excuses either. I _know_ it’s not a cold, so cut the crap already.” Gavin’s mouth snapped shut. “Hell, if I didn’t see you look like death on legs I’d be wondering if you actually were sick that whole time.” His face was a façade to hide a fire that burned and burned – but there was a pain to the words that was so god damn _raw.  
  
_ “You come back and it’s like you’re a whole different person Gav, and when I’m already balls deep in love with you-“ and he spat out the words like they were poison, Gavin flinching away like they were as well “do you think I wouldn’t notice when you’re suddenly as god damn jumpy as a cat? Like you hate me, hate us, have something to fucking hide? And I…” Michael shook his head. “Gav, I don’t understand what happened between then and now.”  
  
“Michael, you’re my boi-“  
  
“-Of course I fucking am!” Michael snapped, “but you’re not exactly making it easy to believe that are you?”  
  
“Do you really think I have a bloody choice?”  
  
“I wouldn’t fucking know!” Michael yelled back. “It’s not like you’ve exactly talked to me over the past few days!”  
  
“Well you haven’t exactly been my first choice for conversation lately with all your sulking!”  
  
“Oh, _I’ve_ been sulking? What was the last conversation with Ryan? You tell me now-“  
  
“ _Don’t_ bring him into this.” Gavin bit back, something more than anger making his voice tremble.  
  
“Oh, and why shouldn’t I? Don’t you understand your hurting every god damn person around you? Pull your head out of your god damn ass and realize what you’re doing for one fucking second!”  
“You don’t think I realize? You think I’m that bloody _dense_?” Gavin said, and he nearly laughed “You think I’m acting like this because I bloody want to?! You know what? Bugger it. _Bugger it.”_ He stepped away from Michael, tugging off his shirt and he didn’t _care_ that he seemed like a god damn lunatic right now because Michael was his boi and the last thing he wanted Michael convinced of was that he was going mad.  
  
“Gavin, what the fuck-“  
  
“Just shut up.” Gavin snapped in return, throwing away the shirt before violently tugging off the bandages. His wings spread rapidly, narrowly missing knocking over a couple of different computers and the games shelf and he could see the anger drain from Michael’s face as the reality of the situation slapped him in the face as quickly as Gavin’s wings snapped out to attention.  
  
“Do you understand _now?”_ Gavin said, bitterness evident in his voice as the wings started to curl in on him, a protective cocoon (because there was more at stake than just a silly crush here). “Do you understand why the bloody hell I had to walk around like I had something stuck up my ass? Because of these!” He flicked them out again for emphasis, and for once he wasn’t holding back the utter vile disgust he had for the wings. The _things_ that had maimed him, disfigured him and made his day to day life a god damn misery. And it was getting better, a part of him knew that – there were now men beside him that actually wanted to _be_ with him. But a larger part of him couldn’t fucking believe it over the aches in his back, the looks as he turned up in yet another oversized jersey to work, of needing to destroy friendships one at a time and each day being a god damn battle against the voice in his head that told him he was a freak, a refugee and a solider in a war only he was fighting and he was losing. He was _losing_ and he cursed out these fucking wings every chance he got because they were ruining him, they were breaking him and he couldn’t handle this anymore-  
  
“Gavin.” Michael said, and fingers were running through his hair and he didn’t want to hear Michael speak right now, didn’t want to put a face to the demons that plagued his mind. His lips crushed into Michael’s with a viciousness that only desperation could bring, teeth clinking together as the Brit sought to drown himself in this. And for a moment it worked; he could feel Michael melting into him with the relief of a man given a second chance, the desperation of the Brit’s action somewhat of a justification to the days of suffering the young Jersey boy had gone through. For a moment the Brit thought he was home safe, that he could just put this behind them and carry on and it wouldn’t be brought up again.  
  
But then Gavin was being pushed back, oh so lightly, and when he tried to surge forward again he was only met with Michael’s fingers on his lips and stern words that there were more important things on hand than this.  
“Gavin, these things?” Michael said, gesturing to them. “They’re fucking beautiful. Do you know how many people in the world would kill for wings like these?”  
  
“They’re not as fun as they look.” Gavin said sullenly.  
  
“You think half of them don’t realize that?” Michael said. “Look, you’re built to fly, you’re lanky as fuck but look at all this fucking muscles.” He gestured wildly up and down Gavin’s exposed frame and with each passing second Gavin was regretting this as his thoughts tumbled and tumbled and he was starting to speak again and he didn’t even know what he was saying anymore-  
  
“Gavin, Gavin please.” And then strong arms were wrapping around his neck and pulling him down into a hug, whispering reassurances as he all but fell apart in Michael’s arms. Sure fingers ran the length of his spine as Gavin fisted his hands in the fabric of the other lad’s shirt, emotion shaking his lanky frame even though the tears wouldn’t come. Part of him was thankful for that. The two men stood like that for some time, Gavin working through the hyperventilation and the discord in his mind before everything slowed. Then strong hands pulled his face in front of Michael’s.  
  
“Gavin. You’re fine. You’re fine here.” Michael said, and there was nothing but warmth and comfort in his eyes and his voice. “Nobody here wants to hurt you – Me, Ryan, Ray, any of the rest of the guys. Hell, have you seen what we do? ‘Freaky’ is our god damn middle name here.” Lips pressed soft to his forehead; with how stooped over the Brit was it was easy for Michael to do so. Michael’s thumbs caressed Gavin’s temples; finally Gavin could feel the animosity seeping out of the other man; Gavin was more than happy to see it leave.  
“I’m gonna love you whether you’ve got four arms and a tail or whether you lose your wings tomorrow. But for now? This is who I’m dealing with” Michael’s lips turned into a smile. “and he’s just as much of a dumb ass as I remember.”

Gavin was about to reply, but the sound of the door opening behind them made them both freeze where they were.  
“Hey Michael, Ryan told me I’d find you two in here talking abou- okay what the _fuck_ is going on?” Ray looked like he’d just been hit by something and Gavin felt like bolting all over again. And he probably would have too, but Michael’s hands came down and gripped his shoulders firmly (and perhaps the Jersey man was only using this as an excuse to feel him up but it was working just as much for Gavin as it was him so the Brit wasn’t about to start complaining).  
  
“It’s a long story.”  
  
It took a lot of fumbling on Gavin’s part, but he managed to retell the story to both of the lads – from the first morning with a very surprised Geoff, right up to the preening with Jack a few days ago. All the while, Michael was rubbing comforting circles into his shoulder, arm, thigh that were admittedly getting more and moredistracting by the second as they moved slower, lighter. Gavin was able to handle it too until Ray scooted over to do the same thing. That. Was not something he could handle right now apparently.  
  
“Guys- I- Uh?” He fumbled out the words with about as much skill one can muster with two attractive guys teasing at his thighs. Which was not much. At all.  
“Guys, I’m, uh, kind of not singlerightnow?” He finally spat out, a strange mix of embarrassment and arousal tinging his cheeks and the synchronised laugh that Michael and Ray followed with just _screamed_ trouble.  
  
“How about if we said neither are we?” Michael purred, leaning in to croon the words into Gavin ear.  
  
“But it’s not with me?” Gavin squeaked back, and he was sure that Michael was eluding to something else but when two guys seemed intent on giving him a hard on – and succeeding - there wasn’t really room for trying to decode what they were saying in his hormone muddled brain.  
  
“And we’re not with your other boyfriends.”  
  
“Yet.” Ray added with a smirk.  
  
“But we’d like to start on that.”  
  
“If that’s alright with you.”  
  
“It would be more alright with me if you _stopped trying to bloody hump me in the middle of the office.”_ Gavin finally spat out, wings fluttering and the two men jumping back in surprise because _okay._ Ray quickly went to apologise, however Gavin was quicker to quieten him. “Seriously, its fine.” He insisted. “Just, don’t you think this is a conversation we should have when I can actually _concentrate_ instead of wondering which of you is going to touch my knob first.” The two lads shared a guilty look.  
Turned out, while Michael had always liked Gavin perhaps a bit _too_ much, those same feelings he had realized extended to the other four hunters as well. And Ray? Ray had realized the same thing. With Gavin in the same boat, there really only seemed to be one problem.  
  
“Man, you have to talk to Ryan.” Ray said, a sympathetic look on his face. “You don’t hate the guy and he’s kind of tearing his hair out trying to figure out what he did to piss you off.” Gavin hung his head, mulling over the words. Because excuses teased at his tongue, and it would be oh so easy to let one slip. Because wasn’t that what he’d been doing for the past few weeks? Excuse after excuse, building a house of cards and he could feel it trembling under his fingers.  
  
“Yeah.” He said simply. “Yeah.”  
  
“And we’re right here with you, yeah?” Ray added, a smile on his face. “You aren’t doing this alone or anything.”  
  
“Not anymore.” Michael agreed, and Gavin couldn’t help and mirror the smile on their faces.  
  
“Team Lads?”  
  
“Team Lads.”  
  
-x-  
  
While a part of Gavin was hoping he was going to be able to put off the situation for another few days, he was largely thankful at the end of the day Michael shoved him back towards the office when Ryan re-entered it. The Jersey man had apparently done more planning than he thought as well; having warned Ryan ahead of time ‘one of them’ would need a ride, and that the remaining Gents had more than a little idea of what he and Ryan were doing.  
 _  
‘Or at least, what we’re hopefully going to do’_ Gavin thought to himself, looking through the glass at the older man clearing off his desk with trepidation gnawing at his stomach. Perhaps it was the guilt warping his perception, but Ryan almost seemed duller than usual. He moved with a sluggish lag to his step – did he cause that? He hoped not. His wings shivered in their binds.  
  
“Uh, Ryan?”  
  
Ryan looked up, and Gavin didn’t miss the plethora of emotions that crossed his face; shock, then hope before it was finally crushed into a look of suspicion. The stony glance made Gavin want to shrink back and run – but he didn’t.  
“What do you want Gavin?”  
  
“I need to talk to you.”  
  
“About what?” Ryan said, arms folding across his broad chest and it had been a long time since Gavin had been intimidated by Ryan’s sheer size before. The strength that he carried in his chest and arms that made a purely instinctual part of him shift uncomfortably – which translated to his wings also twitching uncomfortably in their binds.  
  
“About… This.” He said, gesturing to the couch. “Sit down?”  
  
“I’d rather stand.” Ryan replied coldly. “You’ve got some explaining to do, you know.”  
  
“I know.” Gavin said. “That’s why I’m here.” A beat of silence. “You want the short story, or the long one?”  
  
“The long one.” Ryan replied. “I think I’m entitled to that.” Gavin simply nodded, before slowly starting his story. Pulling off his jersey as he said it started with a cold, following with his shirt as he retold the morning after and finally unwrapping the bandages as he elaborated on just why he’d been so touchy over the last few weeks.  
  
“I mean, how the bloody hell was I supposed to tell you?” Gavin said, shaking his head and laughing, scuffing his foot across the ground. “Especially when I hardly liked the blasted things myself.” But when he looked up to Ryan to gauge his reaction, all he could see was… Hurt?  
  
“Why couldn’t you trust me?”  
  
“I couldn’t even trust myself, to be bloody honest.” Ryan went quiet, as if mulling over the words, and Gavin used the time to step forward.  
“I know that I minged up pretty bad, and I know you don’t owe me anything. But I like you Ryan. Like, _like_ like.” He saw Ryan’s mouth twitch at the comment. “And I want to make this right, you know?” Ryan simply nodded, letting the air sill with a silence that Gavin didn’t quite know how to fill. Luckily, he didn’t have to.  
  
“Can you spread them? Properly?”  
  
Gavin nodded, letting the feathers unfurl into the now familiar patterns, watching as Ryan’s gaze ran across them with unrestrained fascination. Of course, it wasn’t every day that you realized a co-worker had wings, so Gavin wasn’t about to blame him for it. But the action felt strangely… Intimate.  
  
“Can I?”  
  
Gavin nodded, not wanting to disturb the fragile mood of the room as Ryan’s fingers came up to the bridge of Gavin’s wing. A shiver ran through his body at the touch – Ryan was quick to pull back and apologise but Gavin cut him off.  
“No, its fine.” He assured the other man, fluttering his wings for emphasis. “I’m just… Not really used to people touching them, you know?”  
  
“Understandable.” Ryan agreed, reaching forward to touch the peak of Gavin’s wing again. This time Gavin made sure not to move – however, the same strong shiver of sensation ran through him as Ryan’s hand ran the length of the wing. It didn’t feel bad though. No, definitely not, it felt _good_ and Gavin made a noise of appreciation as Ryan stroked down through his longest flight feathers.  
  
“That good, hm?” Ryan said, a deep chuckle resonating in his chest and oh, Gavin had forgotten how nice that sounded.  
  
“You have no bloody idea.” Gavin replied, humming in content as Ryan moved behind him.  
  
“Hey, the feathers on your back are all downy!” Ryan exclaimed, a smile spreading across his face. “Awww, isn’t that cute?”  
  
“Shut up.” Gavin snapped, rolling his eyes even as the equally dorky smile on his face revealed that perhaps he didn’t want him to shut up after all.  
And so it continued, Ryan admiring Gavin’s plumage with a fascination only rivalled by a kid in a candy shop, Gavin enjoying the close contact and the conversation that came as easy as breathing. Things were back to normal, better than normal even despite his wings and he frankly couldn’t be happier. So when Ryan finally said something about going home and maybe getting something to eat Gavin quite frankly didn’t want to leave – leave the office, leave the comfort of Ryan’s touch and the safety that the situation provided. When he mentioned it though, Ryan only laughed.  
  
“Well, you do have some making up to do Gav – why don’t we grab some coffee together tomorrow? You’re paying though.”  
  
“You minge.” Gavin said, rolling his eyes even as a part of him lit up. “It’s a date.”  


-x-  
  
Gavin hadn’t felt so free in weeks.  
Feet dangling off the end of the roof, his wings spread wide behind him the Brit felt more at ease tonight than he had in too long. Perhaps that was in part due to the men below him, chatting and cooking; he could smell the meat sizzling away on the hotplate from where he sat. Geoff was tending to it with the same love some might give a small child – it was totally worth it though for a taste of one of his steaks.  
  
The following days after Gavin and Ryan had talked and made up had been a kerfuffle – a variety of conversations that essentially boiled down to ‘So I know that you like me, and I like him, but does he like me and does he like him and is this really going to work because it’s already getting confusing.’ But thankfully, the only surprise was that they did all apparently like each other in that way; now, on their first of their official ‘dinner dates’ (as Ray had been quick to point out) Gavin was only surprised they hadn’t realized this sooner.  
  
Nobody had really questioned it when Gavin had ducked away, nor when he reappeared on the roof with his wings unbound; Ryan had only waved up at him and Michael yelling something about him being a ‘fucking birdbrain’. But there was no malice in the words. _God,_ it was nice to hear no malice in the words.  
He didn’t even think when he jumped.  
  
He saw Michael nearly fall off the back of his chair, eyes wide as he saw Gavin making a one way trip to the ground. He saw Jack nearly choke on his beer, trying to cough out a yell of warning. He saw Geoff nearly having a god damn heart attack, dropping the spatula as he bolted it to where Gavin was sure to land, yelling an insult that died in his throat.  
Because flying was aiming for the ground and missing; and there was not a British boy in sight. Only a scream that turned into a yell of excitement as Gavin rose higher and higher, wings beating in a steady rhythm behind him and eclipsing the moon from sight.  
  
There was still a lot they needed to figure out; how this weird ass relationship of theirs was going to work exactly, how they were going to hide this when Gavin was so often in the public eye – Geoff had mentioned something about green screens and ‘special effects’ in over exaggerated quotation marks. But tonight he couldn’t be fucked thinking about all that – because tonight was drunk in his joy and new found love, new found love in his boys and himself.  
And really? Nothing had felt so perfect.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! If you have any bright ideas for what you'd like to see me write, let me know at dashofscarlet.tumblr.com - I'd love to get some prompts. <3
> 
> Comments and kudos appreciated and loved!


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